Could your depressed teen turn to drugs?

A NIDA educational pamphlet. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
If you have a teenager that is struggling with depression, be forewarned there is a good chance your teen could seek drug use as a means to self medicate. While some parents may believe alcohol consumption and drugs are a rite of passage for many teenagers, those teens that suffer from mental distress are more likely to become addicted to alcohol and mood altering drugs. Once these drugs are used there is a great risk of a lifelong addiction.

"An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure" is an old saying that rings true with depression, teens and drug use. If you notice that your teen is showing signs of depression the sooner you get them treated by a qualified medical professional the better your chances will be at steering your teen away from drug abuse and a lifelong drug dependency on alcohol and other drugs.

Become educated with the reality of depression and do not assume your teens prolonged depression is something your teen can just "snap out of." Clinical Depression is an illness of the brain that is measurable and usually the result of factors like heredity, chemical imbalances and childhood trauma.

Recovering addicts and depression during the holidays

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You would think that recovering addicts would have so much to be thankful for during the holidays that they'd never get depression. We know now that many addicts suffer from depression aside from their addiction, and, in fact a good deal of their addiction stems from self medicating via pain killers. It is really imperative that recovering addicts find strength and help through their sponsors and to also separately have their depression treated. If you or someone you know is suffering from addiction, or depression and live in South Carolina, see the *link at the end of this article.

Holidays seem to pose a lot of risks for depression with recovering addicts. Trying to stay clean and sober when the whole world seems to be celebrating can often affect the addict's ability to be able to withstand the temptations. Loneliness, even coming down off the former high, can bring about powerful feelings of depression. Things that a recovering addict, or their loved one need to pay attention to are the signs and symptoms of depression.

The symptoms are as follows:

1. Lack of interest in any activities formerly enjoyed. Work, sex, hobbies, etc.
2. Difficulty focusing on tasks and completing tasks especially those that were easy to complete before. Indecisiveness and confusion.
3. Excessive tiredness, low energy.
4. Insomnia or sleeping too much.
5. Feelings of hopelessness, guilt and unreasonable fears
6. Committing suicide, or hurting someone.
7. Loss of weight or gaining weight from either under eating or over eating.

You should be concerned if you are experiencing at least four of these symptoms and if you are experiencing more than four, it is time to seek additional help and support. Depression can be easily treated, and if caught early can be contained in its severity for a recovering addict.

*South Carolina Treatment Centers

For those living elsewhere, see:

Recovery Connection

For those seeking additional information, and support for various types of drug abuse and addiction, see: The Addicted Family.

Related articles by this author:

• Recovering addicts: Avoiding triggers during the holidays
• Celebrities that paid the price of addiction in 2011
• Tips for recovering alcoholics during the holidays

Addicted to eating corn starch

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If you suffer from addiction and you live in South Carolina please see: Addiction Treatment Centers in South Carolina.

Any time you are addicted to any substance there is usually an underlying issue at hand. When you are addicted to consuming non food items the condition is called Pica.

Pica is a condition marked by the continual eating of non nutritive items and the list is long and varied. Eating disorders like Pica need to be medically addressed, and it is usually a red flag of a deficiency in your bodies delicate mineral balance. If you are addicted to eating corn starch then you certainly need to address the problem with your family doctor who may be able to treat your condition or refer you to a specialist that can help.

 In many cases a person suffers from more than one addiction, even in Pica there is a chance you are eating other items which aren't commonly thought of as appropriate for a diet. Simple blood tests can be examined to see if there is an underlying deficiency that can be addressed. In some Pica cases, the patience addiction or craving leads to intestinal blockages, and serious health consequences.

A person that is engaged in any form of Pica needs to understand that even seemingly non dangerous or toxic items are not always manufactured in sterile conditions, nor are they regulated by the Food and Drug Administration. Many non nutritive items manufactured in factories have impurities and trace contaminates that you may not want in your body.

Some trace contaminants can be insect parts, mice excrement and body parts, traces of chemicals used in pesticides as well as petroleum based products. If your body is subjected to these long enough there could be health issues as a result. For help with your Pica, see: Eating disorder referral

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What makes some people become an addict?

Image by nicolas - نيكولس via Flickr

Addiction doesn't encroach on every life of every person, however, most people

know of at least one person either socially or in their own family that struggle with addiction of some kind. If you live in Orangeburg, SC and need help with addiction, see : William J. McCord Center for further help.

Common factors for addiction are listed here:

Genes: Genetics play a significant role: having parents with alcoholism, for instance, makes you four times more likely than other children to become alcoholics. More than 60 percent of alcoholics have family histories of alcoholism. There is a debate however, that genes may not play as big of a role as formerly believed. It has been argued that while most addicts do report having family members that were addicts, it is the environmental conditioning that had the key role in the future addiction of the child of an addict. A child that has been exposed to addiction repeatedly may be more accepting of the behavior and thus partake themselves. This same argument has been presented for obesity in children, citing that the child's continuous exposure to bad eating habits and unhealthy foods resulted in a lifetime of obesity. Whenever children are exposed to any repeated behavior they are very likely to continue it in their own adulthood. This goes for children that grow up to become smokers as well. This would also explain why children that grow up in a home filled with violence, ie: father abuses mother, will sometimes grow up and mimic the behavior in their own lives.
Mental illness: Many addicted people also suffer from mental health disorders, especially anxiety, depression or mood illnesses.
Early use of drugs: The earlier a person begins to use drugs the more likely they are to progress to more serious abuse.
Social environment: People who live, work or go to school in an environment in which the use of alcohol and other drugs is common - such as a workplace in which people see heavy drinking as an important way to bond with coworkers - are more likely to abuse drugs.
Childhood trauma: Scientists know that abuse or neglect of children, persistent conflict in the family, sexual abuse and other traumatic childhood experiences can shape a child's brain chemistry and subsequent vulnerability to addiction. There is a small percentage of addicts that do not fit into any of these molds, this addict may have just had a momentary lapse in judgement and decided to partake in a highly addictive drug. Drugs that are highly addictive have been known to cause addiction after just one use. These types of drugs are often considered the most damaging, lethal and hardest to overcome. For more information on addiction, see: The Addicted Family

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Online support groups for those suffering from pica

Image via Wikipedia

These are contents found in the stomach of someone suffering from pica

Addictions of any kind are a serious matter. If you live in South Carolina, you can seek information and help on addiction here: The William J. McCord Center

There are many different types of addictions that people suffer from. Some of the conventional addictions are alcohol and drugs, however there are addictions that don't fit into that category. There are non food addictions that people also suffer from. This is a disorder called pica.

Pica (pronounced PY-kah) is a medical disorder characterized by an appetite for substances largely non-nutritive (e.g. metal, clay, coal, sand, dirt, soil, feces, chalk, pens and pencils, paper, batteries, spoons, toothbrushes, soap, mucus, ash, gum,or an abnormal appetite for food ingredients (e.g. flour, raw potato, raw rice, starch, ice cubes, salt). For these actions to be considered pica, they must persist for more than one month at an age where eating such objects is considered developmentally inappropriate.

Many people with this disorder have a hard time quitting and so it has some of the familiar earmarks of addiction seen in drug use or alcoholism. Sufferers often do not think they are in any real harm however, non food items are not manufactured under strict conditions like food is, and therefore there are great quantities of impurities in the products. These impurities can be anything from dangerous pesticides and chemicals to rodent and insect body parts and fecal matter. There are a few support groups out there that can be seen by those suffering from this disorder. Here is a list of online pica support groups:

Pica Support Club

Bizarremedical.com

Experience Project

It is important that you seek medical supervision and help for your pica disorder. A medical doctor may be able to do certain blood tests to determine if your disorder is a deficiency that can be easily treated.

For other addictions, information and support, see: The Addicted Family

Addiction to gambling

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South Carolina Department of Alcohol and Other Drug Abuse Services (Click Here) is responsible for general health and addiction services in this state, and may also have information on problem gambling. For statistics on gambling addiction in South Carolina, see: South Carolina Gambling fact sheet

For more information about gambling services in South Carolina, contact:
Christopher Reid
DAODAS,
101 Executive Center Dr., Suite 215
Columbia, SC 29210
telephone: 1-877-452-5155.



What is a gambling addiction?

In America alone, problem gambling affects more than 15 million people. More than 3 million of these are considered severe problem gamblers, otherwise known as gambling addicts or pathological gamblers.  Gambling addiction is a mental-health problem that is understood to be one of many kinds of impulse-control problems a person may suffer from. The types of gambling that people with this disorder might engage in are as variable as the games available. Betting on sports, buying lotto tickets, playing poker, slot machines, or roulette are only a few of the activities in which compulsive gamblers engage. The venue of choice for individuals with gambling addiction varies as well. While many prefer gambling in a casino, the rate of online/Internet gambling addiction continues to increase with increased use of the Internet. Gambling addiction is also called compulsive gambling or pathological gambling.

What are symptoms and signs of a gambling addiction?

Pathological gambling involves persistent and recurring problem gambling that includes several of the following symptoms and are not the result of another mental-health problem, like during a manic episode:

A preoccupation with gambling, either by reliving past gambling, planning for future gambling experiences, and/or thinking of ways to secure money to finance gambling

Needing more and more money for gambling in order to achieve the desired level of gambling enjoyment

Repeated unsuccessful attempts to stop or reduce betting behaviors

Becoming uneasy or easily irritated when trying to reduce or stop gambling

Gambling for the purpose of escaping problems or to relieve sadness or anxiety

Returning to gambling after losing money in an effort to recoup losses

Lying to family or other loved ones, mental-health professionals, or others in an effort to hide the extent of the gambling behavior

Committing crimes (for example, stealing, fraud, or forgery) in an effort to finance gambling

Risking important relationships, employment, or other opportunities due to gambling

Depending on others for money to resolve dire financial situations that are the result of gambling.


Treatment for a gambling addiction:

Where can people get support for gambling addiction?

Compulsive Gambling Center
924 East Baltimore St.
Baltimore, MD 21202
1-800-LOST-BET (1-800-567-8238)
http://www.lostbet.com

Debtors Anonymous
General Service Office
P.O. Box 920888
Needham, MA 02492-0009
Phone: 781-453-2743
Fax: 781-453-2745
http://www.debtorsanonymous.org

Gam-Anon International Service Office, Inc.
P.O. Box 157
Whitestone, NY 11357
718-352-1671

Gamblers Anonymous (GA) International Service Office
P.O. Box 17173
Los Angeles, CA 90017
213-386-8789
isomain@gamblersanonymous.org

Problem Gambling.com
24 Hours a Day
7 Days a Week
U.S. Gambling Hotline: 1-800-522-4700
Canadian Gambling Hotline: 1-888-391-1111

United States National Gambling Help Line
1-800-522-4700

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• Celebrities that paid the price of addiction in 2011
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Check out these helpful DVD's

Questions from our readers: Why are addicts, addicts?

Image via WikipediaWhile there are no simple answers to this question as to why an addict is an addict, there are certain factors that do contribute to the condition. Statistics do show common threads among almost all substance abusers. Some of the common backgrounds are: Childhood sexual and/or mental, emotional and physical abuse and neglect.

Family history- In almost every case of substance abuse there is a link to a friend or family member that the addict was exposed to during childhood. Many times alcoholism and substance abuse can be traced back several generations.

Mental illness- Believe it or not, mental illnesses like depression are often found in those who are addicts. Because of the stigmas placed on mental illness in society many addicts try to self medicate using easily available substances. Unfortunately in this country, it is easier to get crack or marijuana, than it is to get medical help.

Low self esteem- This is a no brainer but most all addictive personalities have deep seated self worth issues. The drug use that is intended to relieve these feelings of low self worth often perpetuate the feelings via guilt, etc. The "crash after the high" often leaves the addict feeling just as low and empty as they did prior to using.

Treatment and Interventions do work!

Image via WikipediaYou may hear a lot of addicts and even addict friends and family say that treatments and interventions don’t work. Bull. It does work, just because the addict failed, doesn’t mean the treatment was a failure. No matter what type of issue we may have in this world, whether its drugs, food, or some other problem we must overcome, the day we say the help didn’t work is the day we gave ourselves the crutch. Treatment and interventions are tools to get you where you need to go, addicts entering treatment that leave early, relapse or even avoid

going  to an intervention  must face their failure to take advantage of a tool that is intended to help them, help themselves.  Here’s an example, if you were dying of an illness and all you had to do was change your  lifestyle and do the suggestions your doctor said to do and you will live, and you fail to do them, who’s fault is it if you die?  If all it took was taking a pill everyday for the rest of your life to stay alive and you refused to do it, is it the pill that stopped working? No. The pill can only work if you take it. Interventions and  in patient treatment centers are exactly the same way. They can help, if the addict takes them to task, and uses what they have to offer.

All addicts will say that treatment doesn’t work, or that interventions won’t do any good. Of course they will say this.  They may go to great lengths to prove it to you as well.  Many will refuse treatment or avoid going to an intervention.  What they want you to believe is that those ideas won’t work, so you will let them continue on their path of self destruction.

So what does the family and friends to when interventions were avoided  and their addict refused treatment, or their addicted loved one relapses? Get them back into treatment, each and every time, that is until you come to a realization that you have done all you can do. Once you reach this conclusion, then the addict  may have to find their own way with or with out you. Find your own help, and attend meetings yourself. Learning how to break free from co-dependency and how to cope with your life so that you can be happy is important whether the addict fails at treatment or not. An addicts failure doesn’t have to be yours. Get healthy, stay happy, and  always, walk in the truth.

Addiction to non food items

Image via Wikipedia

Chalky composed of kaolinite with traces of quartz ingested by a patient with pica.

This condition is referred to as Pica, and it involves the inability to resist eating a wide variety of non food items. It is diagnosed only if it is determined that the sufferer is unable to stop eating non food items, usually after a month of continued eating. There are a wide variety of items that a person suffering from Pica will ingest.

Substances  include but are not limited to dirt, chalk,clay, feces, hair,detergent,laundry starch, fingernails, paint chips, cigarette butts, wire, burnt matches, animal excrement, string, erasers, needles, ice, lead, and rocks.

Pica is a rather common occurrence and does not always signify an ongoing problem as most people have gone through bouts of Pica symptomatic behavior at some point in their lives. In some instances it is a curiosity factor, and can be a subconscious behavior that can stem from hunger or boredom. Pica becomes a disorder that needs additional tests and treatment when the urge to consume dangerous items is compulsive and can not be stopped. Many times it can be a significant sign of a malnutrition that is going on in the sufferers body and blood tests to determine deficiencies may be in order. Many Pica sufferers have an iron deficiency.

There are a large number of those suffering from Pica that have a predisposition to the condition brought on by developmental abnormalities, living in economically depressed areas of the world, mental retardation and pervasive developmental disorders. The key thing to observe in any person feared to suffer from this condition is the amount of time they have been indulging in the behavior.

All those partaking in any addictive behavior should as a rule of thumb, seek medical treatment to rule out physical problems that may be underlying. Consuming even items that seem to be harmless can still have physically negative effects on the body, because non consumable items are often manufactured in warehouses that do not have to follow the same guidelines that food manufacturers do. Once blood tests are done, if no underlying medical conditions are present, it is a good idea to ask your medical professional to suggest  what appropriate therapy to seek out.

Family in crisis, when you love an addict

Image via WikipediaFamily in crisis, when you love an addict

Addiction is a widespread plague across the globe. The odds of you or someone you love coming into contact with an addict are about 1 in 3. Sadly almost every American family has at least one person that is affected by an addict. Many carry the burden in silence, hoping no one will find out. Fear of being judged, or looking like a failure are but a few of the reasons help isn't sought out sooner.

An addict in the family is like having a poison spread among you. Slowly but surely each member is impacted, changed, and hurt. Some may say they have shut the door on the situation, or washed their hands of it, but deep inside damage has already been done, whether they realize it or not. You are never really free of the impact it has had on you. Finding support is a difficult process as so many family members with friends or loved ones that are addicted are ashamed and embarrassed to bring their problem up. What has to be remembered, is that almost every person you know, whether it is your preacher, doctor, friend, co-worker has someone in their life with your problem. They may even have it themselves. Once the shame can be put aside, and this terrible problem brought out, you will more than likely find tons of support. When it comes to addiction, shame is guilt's ugly cousin. Shame is a waste of time, and a way for the disease to conquer all of it's victims one by one.

Keeping your burden to yourself is a way of protecting an addict, and yourself. However, in the long run it is silently enabling a situation to flourish. The time to stop the progress and affect of this disease begins with opening up. You will be amazed at the outpouring of love and support you will get. Not just from your immediate family, but online, from complete strangers. There is a whole world of people suffering right along with you, and many have even gone through worse. Share your experience, reach out to others, and also remember to help another in your search for support. Just because you are going through this terrible time, doesn't mean you can't offer help to someone else. They may be at a different place than you are, so whatever you've learned can be of a great help to them. Giving of yourself is a part of healing.

Please check out these links for further information, support and guidance: 


Addiction to non food items


Supportive Addiction articles


Finding support, overcoming the shame

Supportive addiction articles

Image via Wikipedia
Those of us that love an addict, or are in love with an addict have a special need that goes beyond just being told what to do and what not to do. We need to believe that addiction can be won. We need to believe our addict can be saved, can be brought back..and these articles are selected to reassure you, that yes, in fact, they can. Don't give up. Read on...

There is hope for addiction
Before you read anything else on this site I want you to know there is hope. I would never tell you this unless I knew it with all of my heart, and I have experienced both the devastation of addiction, and the empowerment of seeing the disease conquered.Addiction can be fought and won. It is a possible and it happens every day. The commitment to the recovery is what is key. If you have found yourself here to find help, support and answers for what to do, you need to know there are many going through what you are going through and many have given up too soon, and/or the addict was not committed to the recovery that has to take place.
Read more about why I know There is hope for addiction


Finding support and overcoming the shame
Lets face it, there are support groups everywhere. Some ~ you have to attend to physically, at other times you rally your support in the form of friends and relatives. It's still a lonely existence. Friends and family, hopefully can offer some support but more often than not, they will not understand. No doubt you will be told to seek guidance from a wide variety of outlets and its great for some, but not a perfect fit for others. The best place to find support is from those who have gone through it, lived the nightmare and come out on the other side in one piece. Read on to find out about Finding support and overcoming the shame here.


There is light at the end of the tunnel
Before I go further into the blog of The Addicted Family, let me first say to those here seeking support. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but a lot is going to depend on you, your resolve. Also know that what you define as light now, may change later on. Many times, the light may be about how you are going to be happy, even if your addict never recovers.  I know that sounds simple, perhaps too simple, and I wouldn't even utter these words if I did not know for a fact that this is true. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Continue There is light at the end of the tunnel.

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The addict beside you

Image via WikipediaWhen we think of addicts, we tend to visualize some wino on the corner of a street with a brown paper bag in hand, muttering possibly to themselves. Maybe we see in our minds eye a homeless person desperately getting a fix in a back alley somewhere.

What about the addict that is sitting in your living room, watching television? The addict that you have known and loved for years? It is a different picture, but nonetheless, just as accurate as any other image your may have conjured up  in your mind.

Addicts in the family, are often in disguise and under the cloak of your own loving eyes. We tend not to recognize the problem until it is in full swing. We may notice odd things like weight loss, unusual breathing and snoring at night, or unexplained nervous behavior. We as family members or friends, we never make the assumption initially that this person is an addict. Could they be ill? Dying of some horrible disease like cancer? Why do they look so bad? Months may go by, as your concern grows. At some point you may even ask, "are you on drugs?". You are met with a look of disbelief, and a strong "no".

Knowing those ever so subtle symptoms early on is extremely crucial. Of course you could be wrong, however, better to err on the side of caution, then let too much time pass, and allow what may have been a mild problem flourish into a full blown addiction. Depending on the drug, this can happen quickly so time is always of the essence.

Look for these not so well known symptoms: Restlessness, and restless sleeping with disturbed breathing, glassy eyes and large pupils, sweating for no apparent reason, nervousness or paranoia, sleeping often, personality changes, inability to stay in any one area for any length of time, irritability, unreasonable, argumentative, disinterest in things they used to enjoy or care about,lack or concern for personal hygiene, and open sores on the skin or bad complexion, suddenly consuming alcohol on a regular basis, hiding or withdrawing from family,missing money, missed work.

If you know someone that is showing these signs or symptoms of substance abuse seek help immediately. Consult with your family doctor to discuss possible causes, strategies and treatment. Many family doctors know of additional resources and support that you may not have considered. You have to ask for the help first. Arm yourself for the battle if addiction is present. You are in the fight of your life. Gather all available information and get help today, tomorrow may never come. Please see:  Drug Treatment Addressed During National Drug Fact Week .

Addicted to eating chalk

Image via Wikipedia
Addiction to any substance whether it is considered non threatening or deadly is cause for concern. While some people may indulge in addictions that are well known, such as alcohol or various drugs, there are other addictions, less well known. One such addiction that has recently become newsworthy has been the constant craving and consumption of chalk. This is considered not only an addictive behavior but also an eating disorder called Pica. Pica is a pattern of eating non food items and/or craving them.

Many Internet researches claim that chalk is generally a non poisonous item, consisting mostly of calcium. However this information is not complete and those seeking information should be forewarned. Chalk also has been shown to have lead in them. Those that indulge in eating copious amounts of chalk need to know that Internet information is lacking. Do not assume the first source of information is correct. It took three Internet inquiries just to find out whether chalk had any dangerous ingredients. The first two inquiries made said no poisonous ingredients are found in chalk. This is misleading and should be disregarded. Unfortunately many sites claiming to give the general information, give false and inaccurate information. Be wary of them and never accept the first answer you find.
It is not natural or normal to eat non nutritive items, whether it is chalk, paper, dirt, clay, etc. Consuming these items on a regular basis with the inability to quit makes it an addiction. What makes it an unsafe practice is that most non food substances are not manufactured under the strict guidelines food is. With that in mind, it is not uncommon for many non food items to contain a wide variety of contaminants such as roach and insect body parts, feces and rodent droppings, dust, dirt, urine, and other unclean elements.

Any time your body is craving a non food item, and consumes of it regularly you are in need of having medical care. Although many think this is just an illness or disorder to be treated by a psychiatrist or psychologist, any medical professional that fails to order up a complete blood work up in addition to their treatment is falling short of their responsibility as a caregiver. There could very well be deficiencies to blame for the unnatural cravings, as well as damage that has already taken place inside the body.  For more information on Pica, see:  AllRefer.com Health

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• Understanding Eating Disorders - What are the Different Types of Eating Disorder
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Held hostage by addiction

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When a friend or family member is battling addiction, the whole family becomes engulfed in the problem and in essence is held hostage. Trapped in the addicts world, you either succumb to their addiction by becoming an enabler, or you abandon the addict and withdraw waiting for that one phone call that says it is over.
Family members often become overwhelmed with feelings of guilt, shame, depression and a type of grief is experienced very similar to losing a loved one entirely. The addicts family often defines their happiness by the type of day the addict is having. This is a classic form of co-dependency.

Co-dependency as defined by Merriam Webster’s Dictionary is "a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (as an addiction to alcohol or heroin); broadly : dependence on the needs of or control by another".

Breaking the hold that the addict has over the family is a difficult task. The addict is driven by the urges taking place bio chemically in his body and uses many forms of manipulation to continue to gain support for his lifestyle. It is not beyond an addict to use psychological abuse, guilt, blame and threats to get their family and friends to succumb to their wishes. This is why so often the family is unsuccessful at "curing" or helping an addict on their own.

Finding help for an addict requires doing the one thing that probably many families have tried to avoid. Admitting to someone outside the family that there is a problem. Many families hide and protect the addict and their addiction and go to great lengths to keep it a closely guarded secret. There are many ways to discreetly find help and one resource is online. There are many support groups, and information on the particular addiction you are dealing with. For great resources and help, please visit: Guide for Living.

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Addicts have tools of the trade

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If you live with or are exposed to an addict then you no doubt know that they have a huge arsenal of tools at their disposal that help them deal with you. Guilt may be up in the top five, if not number one on their list. Understand, an addict can rarely accept responsibility for their addiction, so blame and guilt are used twofold, to alleviate their personal responsibility, and to acquire help from you. There are some addicts  that have deep seated pain, guilt and often times unresolved issues that they have tried to numb with the drugs they use. Many, many times, there is abuse during early childhood involved. Family members need to understand that just because they have no recollection of any problems in an addicts past, doesn’t mean they didn’t happen.  Children can keep secrets for years.
Part of understanding what went wrong with an addicted friend or loved one is finding the core issue that is hidden. This can be difficult  as so many have buried the past so deeply within. Sometimes the addict has no known reason. Getting to the root cause is harder for these individuals, because you don’t have their pain to work from necessarily. Some become addicted simply out of a bad decision to “try” a drug. If they are alcoholics, or addicted to other things, ie: food, sex, etc.  Their addictive personalities can be all that was needed to turn the “curiosity” into addiction. Addictive personalities to not have the ability to “refuse” addictive substances.
Now that you have an idea of what tools an addict has to deal with you, it is time for you to figure out what tools you need to deal with the addict. First on the list is understanding there more than likely is a cause from the past that has generated into this addiction, and secondly is to become educated on the particular addiction you are dealing with. Third, waste no time getting help. Immediately.
The focus on treatment needs to take center stage. The time of letting the manipulation of guilt, blame and shame is over. These tools have kept the addict addicted, and possibly you addicted to their problems.  Ironing out fault, blame and problems will come, but you have to deal with a clean mind to make it happen. Do not allow the addict to use their pain to hurt your efforts any more. Acknowledge their pain, but do not allow yourself to dwell on it, if you see that they are using this as a tool of their trade to keep addicted. Healing will come when they are again sober, and you can work on the core issues. Time is of the essence. Time is running out.

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There is hope for addiction

Image by ashley rose, via FlickrBefore you read anything else on this site I want you to know there is hope. I would never tell you this unless I knew it with all of my heart, and I have experienced both the devastation of addiction, and the empowerment of seeing the disease conquered.Addiction can be fought and won. It is a possible and it happens every day. The commitment to the recovery is what is key. If you have found yourself here to find help, support and answers for what to do, you need to know there are many going through what you are going through and many have given up too soon, and/or the addict was not committed to the recovery that has to take place.
Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have additional questions. I will try my best to help you and if I don't know the answer I will find someone that does.
This disease can be won, the unseen chains that have you and your loved one captive can be broken but for it all to come together and work you have to gain the knowledge and the strength to know exactly what you are up against and how to get your own game face on. This is about conquering your fears and your commitment to the process that has to happen too. This is why this site is called The Addicted Family, because the whole family is ill. Not just the addict, but the addict infects every member that has feeling for them. whether its your mom, dad, brother, uncle, aunt, cousin or good friend. Their illness, their addiction is all consuming. If you've made it here its probably because you're ready to save a life. Their life, and yours. There is hope and this you must believe. There is hope. If you can't believe this, and you've become resigned, you are probably wasting your time here. If you still want to fight to save the addict or to save yourself, then please, lets get ready. The battle is on. Get the facts about the specific addiction, learn all you can, and get the empowerment you need. Did you know, most addicts count on you not knowing what they are dealing with? Yes, they do. As long as they think you don't understand they will shut you out. Becoming knowledgeable on their problem puts you one step ahead of what they anticipate. Every tool you have in your arsenal is needed. It all begins with what you understand about addiction and the individual disease(s) you or your loved one is fighting.
Good luck, you're not alone, contact me if you need me, and please study this site, its here for you. And one last thing..I know I have already said, it but it bears repeating...THERE IS HOPE.

There is light at the end of the tunnel for addiction

Image via Wikipedia

To those here seeking support. There is hope.  I know that sounds simple, perhaps too simple, and I wouldn't even utter these words if I did not know for a fact that this is true. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

My loved one was addicted to two separate things, alcoholism, and crack. Lovely combination, right? The alcoholism, existed to my knowledge beyond 20 years. The crack came much later. However, it is important to note that one is a red flag of the other. How so? The disease is an equal opportunity employer. The same mentality that makes a soul succumb to alcohol, will also make this person succumb to any addictive, mood altering, chemical and/or behavior.

 This doesn't mean that every alcoholic becomes a drug addict, nor every addict an alcoholic..what it does mean is the likelihood of this becoming a multi-level addiction is there, and the condition is transferable, all encompassing. You will notice many are addicted to a lot of substances and behavior, including but not limited to sex, cigarettes, & gambling-any form of gambling, whether it is casino style, placing bets of any kind on a regular basis even to the detriment of their financial stability, and also buying compulsively-lottery tickets.

So you may feel you are up against a true legion of sorts. You are, but hopeless? No. As of today, my addicted loved one is clean and sober for over three years. How long were they in treatment? All of ten days! Yes, now am I not by any means saying ten days is all it takes? No. Everyone is different. These results may not be typical, but my reason for mentioning it is simply to let you know, there is hope, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Don't you dare give up. I will say this, if Mohamed won't come to the mountain, the mountain must be brought to him.

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Finding support, overcoming the shame

Image via Wikipedia Lets face it, there are support groups everywhere. Some ~ you have to attend to physically, at other times you rally your support in the form of friends and relatives. It's still a lonely existence. Friends and family, hopefully can offer some support but more often than not, they will not understand. No doubt you will be told to seek guidance from a wide variety of outlets and its great for some, but not a perfect fit for others. The best place to find support is from those who have gone through it, lived the nightmare and come out on the other side in one piece.

This is my story.  My wish is that you will find hope in this painful journey, hope and help before it comes to the worse end possible.  A very wise and cherished friend once told me, in my weakened state of co-dependency, "You have to be happy whether your loved is or not"...those words ring in my mind, every day, a life saving Mantra if you will. Now advice was actually in all honesty in relation to a separate issue altogether, but alas, it works for the family members of an addict as well. You have to go on, live, be happy and function. So often we are pulled under, and into the depths of an addicts Hell. They are blind to it, and oddly enough, it is all you can think about.

So where is the support, calling all cars, the infantry? Let's say first and foremost, it comes from within. You can not fight this beast until you summon your strength inside. This is a beast by the way, make no mistake..and they have your loved one, and you held hostage. Overcoming this beast is about overcoming some of the emotional hang ups you have and becoming the thinking man. Beating addiction is a strategy, make no mistake about it.

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Helping an addicted loved one

Addiction is a disease that poisons whole families.

Image via Wikipedia

Corey Haim, child star of the Lost Boys etc, was found dead in his apartment from an apparent drug overdose at the age of 38.

How do we fight this battle in our own families to avoid this tragic end? Sadly, drug use enters into a family much like a thief in the night. By the time you realize it, it is usually well in force. Family members find themselves in unfamiliar territory as they journey through this devastating attack on their loved ones. Fighting a drug problem, whether your own or a family members takes courage and determination. Summoning support for a wide variety of resources is the only way to combat it head on. 

Image via Wikipedia

 
Strength in numbers-

You are not alone. Once you realize you have a member of your family or a friend that is an addict, take a hold of yourself. Your strength wont only help you, it will help them. Find friends, get over the shame, and realize many people out there know how to help you, even if its just through mutual compassion and understanding. You need this reinforcement, you're up for a huge battle and you have to be ready to call on support. An addict can manipulate, lie, steal and trick you in their attempts to gain money and other means of support from you. You need others input to help you. You also need to use some of the addicts own methods to help them. Tactics to battle this disease often times means using many methods, if you have to trick them, or lie to get them the help they need do not hesitate. Every minute of addiction is one more nail in the users coffin. Tomorrow will not be easier than today.

Get educated-

Know what signs to look for. Some to keep an eye out for is lying, dilated pupils, blood shot eyes, sweating, snoring or unsettling sleep patterns, shortness of breath, irrational behavior, change in personality and temper. Research the drug, and the information that is available. Your local library and your own computer offers a wealth of information on the subject. To fight any disease is to have the right knowledge.

Plan your confrontation ahead of time-

Summon your support and round up your family and friends to help. Tell them you care and love them and know in your heart that they are a good person that made a bad decision. Say what you mean and mean what you say. An addict will sleep in the gutter if they have to, so idle threats are of no use to them. You have to make them understand the extremes you are willing to go to. If it means calling their employer, or reporting them to the police do so. You are fighting for their life, and regret is a painful thing to live with if you do nothing and they die. Don't cover for them. Don't make life easy for them. Use any means necessary to get them into treatment. If they are really bad off, get them help immediately. Do not waste time with outpatient services. They need inpatient round the clock care.

Get counseling for yourself-

There are wonderful support groups out there for you, and your family.

Do know, that people do overcome addiction. Do not give up, addiction takes dedication to recovery. Yours and your loved ones. Relapses may occur, but the ongoing key to lifetime recovery is lifetime commitment to fight it.

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