Addiction help and support for families still needed

Image via WikipediaWhile there is a vast amount of information out there on addiction, including televisions shows devoted to helping addicts get clean, there is a great need still for support and help where the family is concerned. Addiction is a family disease/disorder. Families often are caught in a vortex of confusion, pain, fear, shame and guilt when they live within the circle of an addicted loved one. For so many there is a need to protect the addict and a legacy of secrecy is formed.

Families may try desperately to solve the problem on their own with no outside help. Many times to spare themselves and their loved one any embarrassment or shame. However, nothing could be more damaging for the addict or family. This subtle form of enabling may seem an option, but handling something so immense can
rarely be battled without bringing in outside help.

Once this is realized, and help can be gotten for the addicted loved one, what now happens with the family? Families need to address the dynamics of their lives that may have played a part in the addiction. This is no means a blame game, but it is important to identify problem areas that existed. There may be many factors that brought your family and your addicted loved one to this point in their lives. In most families, there is an enabler, an abuser, a user (whether it is drugs, prescription meds, or alcohol), the one in denial, the victim.

In some families there may be one individual that plays several of these roles. Either way, if these members are going to continue to exist in the recovering addicts life, it is imperative that their life changes right along with the addicts, otherwise, the chances of ongoing sobriety is compromised. This why families need support just as much as the addict does. For more information contact:
Treatment Solutions Network Family Support

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Sexual Addiction

Image via Wikipedia

Are you suffering some Sexual Addiction?

If you live in the Orangeburg, or other areas of South Carolina and need help with any form of addiction, please see: South Carolina Treatment Centers.com

Sexual addiction is a popular model to explain hyper-sexuality, which is in essence, sexual urges, behaviors, or thoughts that appear extreme in frequency or feel out of one's control. There is no consensus among sexologists for whether the phenomenon represents an actual addiction or even a psychological/psychiatric condition at all. Sex addicts engage in distorted thinking, often rationalizing and justifying their behavior and blaming others for problems. They generally deny they have a problem and make excuses for their actions. Proponents of the sexual addiction model draw an analogy between hyper sexuality and substance addiction, recommending 12-step and other addiction-based methods of treatment.

Behaviors associated with sexual addiction include:

• Compulsive masturbation, self sexual stimulation
  
• Multiple affairs (extra-marital affairs)
  
• Multiple or anonymous sexual partners and/or one-night stands
  
• Consistent use of pornography
  
• Unsafe sex
  
• Phone or computer sex (cyber - sex)
  
• Prostitution or use of prostitutes
  
• Exhibitionism
  
• Obsessive dating through personal ads
  
• Voyeurism (watching others) and/or stalking
  
• Sexual harassment
  
• Molestation/rape
  

Sexual rehabilitation and treatment:

• Residential sex addiction treatment. With these programs, individuals live on-site at the treatment facility for the duration of the process. This level of inpatient care allows the individual to focus solely on his or her recovery without the distractions of the outside world (and the temptations that come with them).
• Outpatient sex rehab. Some individuals are simply unable to put everything in their life on hold so that they may attend a residential sex rehab program. Outpatient treatment fills this void nicely as it allows men and women to attend sex addition counseling during the day, but then return home to be near their families and/or support system in the evening.
• Holistic sex rehab. A number of programs seek to enhance overall wellness during sex addiction treatment through holistic means. These holistic rehab centers incorporate programs such as yoga or meditation into the flow of treatment. As a result, individuals are able to find a greater harmony and balance in their lives – a fact that greatly enhances their chance of overcoming sex addiction.
  

Treatment Centers in your area:

Starting Point LLC

1421 Bluff Road

Columbia, SC 29201

Alcohol and Drug Addiction Treatment Center Earle E Morris Jr

610 Faison Drive

Columbia, SC 29203

Richland Springs Psychiatric Hospital

11 Medical Park

Columbia, SC 29203

The Midlands LRADAC/The Behavioral Health Center of

1325 Harden Street

Columbia, SC 29204

MCXL-PHS (ASAP) Moncrief Army Community Hospital

4500 Stuart Street

Columbia, SC 29207

Veterans Affairs Medical Center William Jennings Bryant Dorn

6439 Garners Ferry Road

Columbia, SC 29209

William Jennings Bryan Dorn

6439 Garners Ferry Road

Columbia, SC 29209

Alcohol and Drug Abuse Tri County Commission

910 Cook Road

Orangeburg, SC 29115

Call 1-877-772-6302 To Discuss Treatment Options if you or a loved one has been diagnosed with Addiction and/or a Mental Health Disorder.

Supportive addiction articles

Image via Wikipedia
Those of us that love an addict, or are in love with an addict have a special need that goes beyond just being told what to do and what not to do. We need to believe that addiction can be won. We need to believe our addict can be saved, can be brought back..and these articles are selected to reassure you, that yes, in fact, they can. Don't give up. Read on...

There is hope for addiction
Before you read anything else on this site I want you to know there is hope. I would never tell you this unless I knew it with all of my heart, and I have experienced both the devastation of addiction, and the empowerment of seeing the disease conquered.Addiction can be fought and won. It is a possible and it happens every day. The commitment to the recovery is what is key. If you have found yourself here to find help, support and answers for what to do, you need to know there are many going through what you are going through and many have given up too soon, and/or the addict was not committed to the recovery that has to take place.
Read more about why I know There is hope for addiction


Finding support and overcoming the shame
Lets face it, there are support groups everywhere. Some ~ you have to attend to physically, at other times you rally your support in the form of friends and relatives. It's still a lonely existence. Friends and family, hopefully can offer some support but more often than not, they will not understand. No doubt you will be told to seek guidance from a wide variety of outlets and its great for some, but not a perfect fit for others. The best place to find support is from those who have gone through it, lived the nightmare and come out on the other side in one piece. Read on to find out about Finding support and overcoming the shame here.


There is light at the end of the tunnel
Before I go further into the blog of The Addicted Family, let me first say to those here seeking support. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but a lot is going to depend on you, your resolve. Also know that what you define as light now, may change later on. Many times, the light may be about how you are going to be happy, even if your addict never recovers.  I know that sounds simple, perhaps too simple, and I wouldn't even utter these words if I did not know for a fact that this is true. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Continue There is light at the end of the tunnel.

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There is hope for addiction

Image by ashley rose, via FlickrBefore you read anything else on this site I want you to know there is hope. I would never tell you this unless I knew it with all of my heart, and I have experienced both the devastation of addiction, and the empowerment of seeing the disease conquered.Addiction can be fought and won. It is a possible and it happens every day. The commitment to the recovery is what is key. If you have found yourself here to find help, support and answers for what to do, you need to know there are many going through what you are going through and many have given up too soon, and/or the addict was not committed to the recovery that has to take place.
Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have additional questions. I will try my best to help you and if I don't know the answer I will find someone that does.
This disease can be won, the unseen chains that have you and your loved one captive can be broken but for it all to come together and work you have to gain the knowledge and the strength to know exactly what you are up against and how to get your own game face on. This is about conquering your fears and your commitment to the process that has to happen too. This is why this site is called The Addicted Family, because the whole family is ill. Not just the addict, but the addict infects every member that has feeling for them. whether its your mom, dad, brother, uncle, aunt, cousin or good friend. Their illness, their addiction is all consuming. If you've made it here its probably because you're ready to save a life. Their life, and yours. There is hope and this you must believe. There is hope. If you can't believe this, and you've become resigned, you are probably wasting your time here. If you still want to fight to save the addict or to save yourself, then please, lets get ready. The battle is on. Get the facts about the specific addiction, learn all you can, and get the empowerment you need. Did you know, most addicts count on you not knowing what they are dealing with? Yes, they do. As long as they think you don't understand they will shut you out. Becoming knowledgeable on their problem puts you one step ahead of what they anticipate. Every tool you have in your arsenal is needed. It all begins with what you understand about addiction and the individual disease(s) you or your loved one is fighting.
Good luck, you're not alone, contact me if you need me, and please study this site, its here for you. And one last thing..I know I have already said, it but it bears repeating...THERE IS HOPE.

Famous Addicts

If you think you are alone in your fight with addiction you are very much mistaken. In fact the only thing that makes you unique and different in this point and time today is the fact that you are still alive. Addiction takes everyone down to their knees and this partial list of famous addicts is proof that you are headed down a one way track, and like these celebs found out, you may never come back.

Download:

FLVMP43GP

Download:

FLVMP43GP

Celebrity! Confessions of a Celebrity Addict 

Celebrity Addict (add name of favourite celebrity)Mug

The Harder They Fall: Celebrities Tell Their Real-Life Stories of Addiction and Recovery 

Celebrity Addict (add name of favourite celebrity) Keychain 

Reefer Madness: A History of MarijuanaAddicts - Face Tapestry 

 

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Arm yourself for the battle

Image by Polina Sergeeva via FlickrHow to arm yourself for the battle:
I can not stress how important it is for addicts, and the family members of addicts to become educated on the subject of not only addiction but the type of addiction that you or your family member or friend may be using. Please understand, tough love is not just about shutting this person out of your life, and if you think this will cure them, it wont. Understand, the addict has a new love, a new family, and nothing you can do outside of intervention and treatment will help them.  The only way a true addict feels punished is when they have no access to their new love, the substance they crave. Some people think that if they just shut the addict out of their lives or shun them from the family to teach the addict a lesson. This should be a bottom line in an intervention, not the only thing the family does or the first thing a family should do. Everything you do short of intervention, and treatment is useless to the addict. The only thing an addict gets out of  an old fashioned shunning  is a new excuse to use, and abuse.That doesn't mean you have to have them around  night and day, that simply means take action. The only action that can give them a chance. Get them into treatment ANY WAY YOU CAN. Use all means and methods, trick them, lie, do what you have to do to get them where they need to be to get well. PERIOD.
Recognize what hasn't worked. My father stopped associating with his alcoholic father years prior to his passing. It did NOTHING to stop the man from drinking.
Use ultimatums as your bottom line. This you deliver at an intervention, preferably a professionally orchestrated intervention. It shouldn't be your first line of defense with any addict, because it just simply wont work. Friends of friends or distant family members will tell you to cut the addict off, as if the world were fashioned from only black and white scenarios. We all know this isn't realistic.  So how to do we go after this killer? This destroyer of lives and families?
Your first weapon is to read everything you can get your hands on. Educate yourself, knowing the enemy is half the battle. Symptoms, cause and effects..everything. Leave no resource unsought.

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Why The Addicted Family?

Image via Wikipedia Addicts are seldom a single entity. I for one, will go on record as saying, I don't like giving addicts excuses by blaming their families. That being said, the reason for the title The Addicted Family is because the whole family is made ill by the addiction.

If you ever spent a sleepless night, or rode around looking for your addict all over town, or lied to people to cover for the addict, you're just as ill as they are. Don't fret, this is how love copes initially with this type of disease.

We do things, in the name of love that defy logic in the eyes of those not in this vortex. We even imitate some of the addicts behavior. No? Have you ever lied, even though it went against what you believe in?

Have you ever given them money that you knew wasn't all yours to give to help them get a fix so they wouldn't get sick? Have you helped them break the law by driving them to where ever they go to  get what they need?

You become an addict, you are addicted to them, their life, their needs come before your own. You are absorbed into their soul, and your happiness is only when you know where they are, and that they are ok...for the moment. When you see them, you are getting your temporary fix.

You breathe a sigh of relief when they finally show up at your door, and collapse on your couch. Maybe they were out all night, maybe they drove a car under the influence...no matter what the circumstances, you are now like the addict, once he pulls that strap off his arm, or has that final drink before he passes out.

This is why the family is now the addicted family. Its no dig on you, you've done what you could. What lies in store for your happiness now? Does it all hinge on the addict? Does it all come down to what they are going to  do, or does it fall squarely in your lap, and what you will no longer do?

Finding support, overcoming the shame

Image via Wikipedia Lets face it, there are support groups everywhere. Some ~ you have to attend to physically, at other times you rally your support in the form of friends and relatives. It's still a lonely existence. Friends and family, hopefully can offer some support but more often than not, they will not understand. No doubt you will be told to seek guidance from a wide variety of outlets and its great for some, but not a perfect fit for others. The best place to find support is from those who have gone through it, lived the nightmare and come out on the other side in one piece.

This is my story.  My wish is that you will find hope in this painful journey, hope and help before it comes to the worse end possible.  A very wise and cherished friend once told me, in my weakened state of co-dependency, "You have to be happy whether your loved is or not"...those words ring in my mind, every day, a life saving Mantra if you will. Now advice was actually in all honesty in relation to a separate issue altogether, but alas, it works for the family members of an addict as well. You have to go on, live, be happy and function. So often we are pulled under, and into the depths of an addicts Hell. They are blind to it, and oddly enough, it is all you can think about.

So where is the support, calling all cars, the infantry? Let's say first and foremost, it comes from within. You can not fight this beast until you summon your strength inside. This is a beast by the way, make no mistake..and they have your loved one, and you held hostage. Overcoming this beast is about overcoming some of the emotional hang ups you have and becoming the thinking man. Beating addiction is a strategy, make no mistake about it.

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